You Know You’re an Escort if…

1. You’re staying at a 2 star motel, and there are only Hummers and Mercedes in the parking lot.

2. You’re staying at a 5 star hotel, and all the women are under 25.

3. You wish your Victoria’s Secret Charge Card earned miles. You’d have six free round-trips to Japan

4. You’re “time of the month” comes not only once a month, but conveniently whenever you need to play hookey from something.

5. You could compete in the Fastest Texters in the Universe Olympics and definitely place.

6. You know more about the finest hotels, restaurants and hotspots in the city than Yelp.

7. You watch double agent spy movies and feel as though you identify with the main characters.

8. You think a 9-5 job at Dunder-Mifflin is like a 15-20 year sentence at San Quentin.

9. You prefer three letter acronyms to complete phrases. GFE, PDA, LOL, OMG, etc.

10. You burst out laughing whenever your friends or family say “I want to go to Greece."

Sorry, I couldn’t resist. Don’t worry, I won’t sign-off without a tidbit of advice:

Set the mood for your clients and create a sexy play-list on your Ipod. I have it in pink, of course.



Speaking of top ten lists, her are my favorite “looove” tracks.  (and, shit. Now you know my age.)

Ben Harper - Sexual Healing
Latyrx - Balcony Beach
Faithless - Reverence
Sting - Fields Of Gold
Dave Matthews Band - Grace Is Gone

Kaskade - I Remember
Dido - Here With Me
John Mayer - Half Of My Heart
Chris Isaak - Wicked Game
Buddha Lounge - The Rag-And-Bone Man



xo
Chastity